What's My Price?

Hello!

I am sorry I have not written in a while, I have been having too much fun! I tried to break my experiences into sections so that you don’t have to read about everything.  

Nyame na adom (By God’s grace I am fine) I think Ghana is the most religious country in the world!

GHANAIANS

Ghanaians are the most inventive and the strongest people in the world, or at least the people I have met. This is saying a lot coming from me, because at my family camps with our neighborhood every summer, I have seen awesome creations that come from few resources.

I had to think of a way to describe Ghanaians’ strength, and looking around, I’ve found so much strength. For instance, there is no such thing as a stroller here because all of the women carry children up until about the age of four on their backs with 2 yards of cotton. Women swing the child under their arm to put the child on their back, and then take the fabric to tie it around themselves as well as the child, tucking in the extra fabric. This takes the women a total of about 20 seconds and my sister said I could try it with my two year old brother soon. Another thing that is different is that there are no shopping carts or grocery stores. Women buy food almost every day and then have to make a dinner for the family with it. All of the meat is fresh, usually bought with the head still on, especially fish! I asked my sister how she felt about seeing a goat or chicken run around the house one day then knowing that you are eating it the next and she laughed because it is very normal. Shopping carts are also not needed because everyone puts the items on their head with a small piece of cloth rolled in a spiral. All I can say is it is HARD and one needs really good balance in order to do this.

I say Ghanaians are inventive because there are not a lot of resources available here but they make the most out of every situation. I saw a man with a broken umbrella one day and the next he was carrying it with a small bottle attached to the top for better support and weight. Another example is with the kids, they would take a string, stick, water bag, and a stone to make a small car to pull around to play with. Also, talking to my sister I know she does not like if anything goes to waste so we save a lot and start a fire or something else that is beneficial.

I have officially been in Ghana for four weeks today. The days are flying by but I feel like I have been here a lot longer than I actually have, I want to move here.

WORK

I last wrote after my presentation on Wednesday the 13^th, and since then I have had a few interesting things happen to me at work. I had to say goodbye to a colleague who goes to school 2 hours away from me in Michigan, it is funny because it took us coming all the way to Africa, to meet each other. I also learned that Ghanaians do not like Monday mornings as there were not a lot of people out. The lights went out for a few days at the work place due to unpaid bills that made reports and papers more difficult to write. It was interesting typing up all 90 of the non-governmental organizations’ (NGOs) visions, because it enlightened me on what the people want to see changed in the community. The five main themes the visions shared are women’s empowerment, children’s education, providing resources to those in need, disease education mainly with AIDS/HIV, and Religion.

 I also had the opportunity to go on a case where I had to go to this 3^rd grader’s school to find his parents because he was found at an orphanage 4 hours away in Accra. Unfortunately, there was not enough information, so my co-worker Augustine and I were not able to locate the parents of the child. At work I sat in on my first child custody case and it was in Fante so I did not understand. Yet, when it was translated to me, I realized how complicated it was and it sounded like it could be a reality television show on it. I made two agendas for Day-Care Center meetings and it is different because here after every meeting refreshments are expected. Work ethics in Ghana are different because people do not get paid on time, so there is a lack of motivation.  For example, in the past 6 months for a government office. This is not anyone’s fault, just when people don’t pay taxes and there is a lack of enforcement, there is a glitch in the system.  I love work because I feel like change is occurring, even if it is small bits at a time.

WEEKENDS

The weekend of June 14^th was a really good weekend and I truly felt like a Ghanaian. On Friday I hung out with some people who were Ghanaian and other ProWorld interns/ volunteers. Then on that Saturday it was ProWorld day to do our impact project.  I was scared that I would not be able to go because my roommate locked me in the bathroom. She was brushing her teeth and when she left she just locked it. Our home shares the bathroom with the landlord’s sister’s son, and so it locks from the outside of the door. After 10 minutes of pounding, she finally came back and we made it to the TroTro on time.  From the house we went to a village to build a clinic, because the village currently has one car that goes to and from town; it takes 45 minutes to get to a hospital, on a good day. Since we were starting the building in a new location due to a misunderstanding of the land, we had to make more cement bricks and carry the old ones over. To make bricks one needs a lot of water, sand, and mixture/clay. My job, along with 15 others, was to get the water from a well and bring it to the new spot. Yet, the catch was we had to carry the buckets full of water on our heads and not spill. This was a lot harder than it looked to keep it balanced and carry it the 1 mile there, pour it in the large container, and then go back and do it once more. I was one out of three girls that actually kept it on my head; I am a little stubborn to say the least. Afterwards, we had to shovel the cement into a shape of a brick and begin making the clinic.

 That same weekend I went to church on Sunday where the priest did his sermon in English for me, and church was only three hours this time. Then I learned how to cook palm nut soup that we ate for dinner. I went to the market to buy the fish and got them ready by snapping the tail and head off, picking off the scales, and scooping out the undesirable insides. Once the fish was in and spices were added, the soup sat on the fire while I did my laundry ALL BY HAND!  This took me about three hours because I had to learn the proper way to wash and hang my clothes.

The following weekend on Saturday all of the volunteers and interns planned a trip to see the village on stilts which is called Nzulezu. This took us 4 hours in a TroTro that was meant for a tight fit of 15 that we managed to squeeze 21 into. Upon arrival we were taken on an hour canoe trip where I had a man named 50 cent that helped us row. The beautiful village has 450 individuals in it where each parent has about 10 children. The village is around 600 years old. The village reminded me a lot of some of the other villages because there were still chickens running around although it was built on water. Then 10 of us decided we were going to stay the night at the Axim Beach Hotel on the shore. We got three connecting rooms that had air conditioning and a balcony overlooking the ocean with palm trees that was 25 cedis a person, so 12 US dollars! Spending Sunday on the beach was relaxing and is where I got my first kiss of sun.

RELATIONSHIPS

I have been learning a lot about the families here as I am part of an amazing one. The marriage ceremonies here are really interesting and there is no such thing as eloping. After the man decides he wants to marry, his parents will go to the woman’s family with a gift and ask permission. If her family is satisfied with what the other family has brought, they will send a list of things and set a price for their daughter for the groom and his family to provide before he can marry the bride. Then after a few days the man and his family will have to buy the gifts and return to woman’s family to hear the decision. If the answer is a “yes”, then they are married and will make it official through the government. This makes me wonder what my price would be? Yet, most commonly this is not when the wedding takes place; it could be after the couple has kids or whenever they decide. There is no such thing as a small wedding and they are really important.  The week before the weeding, the girl stays in her house and does not leave or see her fiancé. There is a lot of cooking going on and all family members not in the area stay over at the house, so it is really full. All weddings are on Saturday and I would really like to attend one.

Here relationships are really important and interesting. The dating is viewed as an opportunity to get to know someone whereas back home one would really get to know the other person before it comes “Facebook official.” When we were talking in the office about relationships, one of my colleagues said she wanted to figure out herself and pursue her dreams and then dedicate her time to a significant other and my boss gave his insight.  Amofa described that relationships overpower materials and then gave an analogy about arms. Two arms grow at the same time, but if one arm grew faster than the other, one arm would always be longer. So in the same way, two people should grow together at the same rate, without one putting more effort into the relationship than the other.  

Walking down the street, I can tell that relationships are important because I could not even count how many times I have been asked for my number or to date someone. At first I thought that everyone wanted to get out, thinking I would take them to America, which made me get a better perception of what people thought of America. Yet, when I started to hang out with a big group of Obrunis, I realized that it was not just because I was white and could take them to America. Confused, my roommate and I asked my sister why this was and she responded that because of my hourglass shape, curves, and smile, Ghanian men are drawn to me. This was definitely a confidence booster coming from a breakup back home, but it is difficult at times.  At police check points, bargaining with taxi drivers, and shopping , the other interns make me talk to get away with having too many people in the car or different situations. This does not bother me, just I have to joke with the other Obrunis that they cannot sell me if they need to. Yet, one uncomfortable situation that stands out is when I walk past a certain man that everyday who really wants to marry me. I thought he was kidding, so I always just smiled – that is, until he bought me a ring and proposed. He was completely serious, and now it is really awkward walking to and from my home.

Yet, looking at custody cases and watching the soap operas with my sister, I am learning that even though relationships are important, they could be a little deceitful. 

Talking about relationships makes me think of all my support groups back home, which reminds me of what I miss and I want to say thank you!

I will be writing more soon.

Love,

Aba Lydia